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Category: Divorce

  • Divorce Tips and Strategies

    Ending a marriage can be a chaotic, trying time. You have a lot going on. Meetings with attorneys, mediation, forms to fill out, and documents to submit are practically endless. Having a few divorce tips and strategies in your pocket makes things easier to have a plan in place.

    Four divorce tips and strategies:

    Creating a divorce strategy ahead of time benefits you in many ways. It helps protect your assets, potentially reduce expenses, improve your chances of custody and visitation, and more. Often it even helps preserve your peace of mind and reduce stress.

    1. Slow Down and Evaluate Your Options

    By the time you decide to divorce, you likely want it to be over and done with as quickly as possible. That’s a perfectly normal feeling, but it also often leads to mistakes.

    It’s vital to slow down and take the time to evaluate your situation. This prevents you from rushing into an unfavorable divorce settlement.

    The decisions you make right now have long-lasting effects. Once final and in place, it’s difficult and often expensive to change the terms of your divorce agreement. Make sure you can live with the conditions, the split of assets, the custody arrangement, and any support payments. You have a better chance of fixing problems now than you do later.

    Related Reading: Grounds for Divorce in Oregon

    2.   Recruit Help

    A big part of your divorce strategy should include seeking the advice and guidance of an experienced divorce lawyer. Every divorce is unique and it’s essential to consult a knowledgeable family law attorney to understand how your specific circumstances affect the process.

    Experienced attorneys are full of divorce tips and strategies. A qualified divorce lawyer will educate you on your rights, let you know your options, and provide guidance in navigating the divorce process.

    Even if you take a do-it-yourself approach, consider consulting a family law attorney. You may not retain them for the long haul, but sometimes with just a consultation, they can point you in the right direction, offer advice, and inform you of any specific issues you need to be aware of.

    If you reach an agreement, it also often benefits you to have a professional look over the paperwork to ensure it’s all on the level.

    Divorce is also stressful. You shouldn’t overlook the emotional impact and the toll it takes. Beyond a divorce lawyer, consider tools to help support your mental and emotional well-being. Working with a therapist may provide useful tools to manage stress and cope with a difficult situation.

    Related Reading: How Long Does Divorce Take?

    3. Establish the Right Precedents

    There are many ways establishing a precedent can help (or hurt) you in divorce.

    If you have children, being an active, regular part of their existence is important. Not only for them but also for your custody claim.

    • The courts are reluctant to drastically change a child’s daily life and routine. If you aren’t in their lives as much during a pending divorce, that sets a precedent going forward.
    • When deciding custody, they evaluate how entrenched each parent is in day-to-day activities. The more involved you are, the more likely a custody arrangement and parenting plan will reflect that.
    • As part of your divorce strategy, you shouldn’t move out of the marital home until you create a separation agreement. Moving out can set a precedent that doesn’t accurately portray your financial situation.

    For example, if you move out, but continue to contribute financially to both households, that may impact how the court rules on support. Even if you struggle to keep both households afloat—draining savings, borrowing money, neglecting other obligations—the court may see that as sustainable for the long term.

    This can turn what you meant as a temporary transition into a permanent responsibility.

    Related Reading: How to File for Divorce in Oregon

    4. Prioritize What’s Most Important to You

    Prioritizing is essential. This is a key part of outlining your divorce strategy. Deciding where you’re willing to compromise, and where you’re not, saves you time, money, and stress.

    Emotions tend to flare during a divorce. It’s easy to find yourself in a heated battle about an asset you don’t really care about just because you don’t want your ex to win. If you emerge victorious, it might feel good for a moment. But in the big picture, it wastes time and money and causes unnecessary stress.

    Figure out what’s most important to you, what you need, and what you can’t live without.

    That’s where you should spend your time and focus your efforts. Not racking hundreds or thousands of dollars worth of attorney fees arguing back and forth about who gets the painting of a seascape you found at a garage sale.

    Know what you need and want and take the steps to achieve your goals.

    Establishing a divorce plan early goes a long way to securing a favorable outcome. Not everything will work out to your advantage, but preparing helps increase your odds. These are just a few divorce tips and strategies to keep in mind that may prove useful.

    Related Reading: Divorce Statistics: From the Interesting to the Surprising

  • Do Long-Term Marriages Complicate the Divorce Process?

    Over the course of a marriage, two lives become intertwined. The longer the marriage, the more interwoven they become. Like others, long-term marriages end for a variety of reasons. As the years go by, however, unique divorce issues arise. What should you look out for?

    Shorter marriages are understandably usually much more straightforward when it comes to divorce. In the case of ending longer marriages, it’s much more complex as there’s often a great deal to unravel.

    How Do Long-Term Marriages Affect Divorce?

    As we said, people end long-term marriages for countless reasons. Gray divorce, divorce over the age of 50, has been on the rise over recent decades as people live longer, healthier, more active lives well into their later years. Though that’s often the case, it’s not only older couples divorcing after lengthy unions.

    What is considered a long-term marriage in Oregon?

    The decade mark is usually the line for what many consider a long-term marriage. 
    Ending a long-term marriage often becomes a complicated endeavor. If you plan to divorce after being married for more than ten years, multiple issues need special attention. 

    There’s less of a social stigma attached to divorce than in earlier eras. With improved education and employment opportunities across the board, people are less likely to stay in a broken, unhealthy, unsatisfying marriages than in previous generations.

    Some couples stay together for the sake of children. But once the kids grow up and move out, you have fewer reasons to maintain the status quo.

    Related Reading: Is Your Business A Divisible Asset? How To Protect Your Business During A Divorce

    Division of Property in Long-Term Marriages

    In shorter situations, it’s often relatively simple for a couple to split up their property in a divorce. Couples divide what they have, if they have anything, and go on about their business. But for long-term marriages, this is often much more difficult.

    Oregon practices equitable distribution. This means the state views the property as belonging to the spouse who acquired it. In long-term marriages, however, the lines of ownership often tend to blur.

    The longer the relationship, the more tangled things become.

    The goal of the division of property in a divorce is for each party to emerge on a relatively even financial footing. Ideally, both spouses will be able to enjoy a lifestyle similar to that experienced while married.

    In long-term marriages, this often takes a great deal of work between the spouses, with mediators, or even in court.

    Related Reading: How is Debt Divided?

    Spousal Support

    Child support follows a strict equation. On the other hand, spousal support is usually less formulaic. Many variables come into play when settling on a number.

    Among other things, the courts consider:

    • The health of both spouses.
    • Future earning potential of each party.
    • Amount of shared debt.
    • Length of the marriage.
    • Whether one spouse supported the other.

    As the division of property, the goal of spousal support is to position the supported spouse as close as possible to the standard of living experienced during the marriage.

    In many cases, especially in longer marriages, spousal support payments continue indefinitely. Things like remarriage can impact this, but it varies from case to case.

    Related Reading: Spousal Support in Oregon: What You Should Know

    Long-Term Marriages and Retirement

    As we get older, we tend to give more and more thought to retirement. Many people have an IRA, 401(k), military pension, or other retirement benefits.

    It’s important to account for all of these because they are all on the block to be divided in a divorce. How much depends on a variety of factors. In the case of long-term marriages, it can be a hefty chunk.

    Divorce may have a substantial impact on any retirement plans you’ve made. In some cases, people wind up working much longer than they originally intended. Many often stay at jobs or at least have to find other work after dividing retirement benefits.

    Social Security is also something to consider in long-term marriages, and the length has a huge impact here. If your marriage lasted at least ten years, you can receive Social Security benefits based on your ex’s work history.

    If you are older than 62 and currently unmarried, you also qualify. This is most common in cases where one spouse earned significantly more than the other.

    With so many factors in play, it’s likely in your best interest to consult a divorce attorney or a financial professional.

    Related Reading: How are Social Security Benefits Divided in a Divorce?

    Living Arrangements

    One of the biggest changes many experience after a divorce following a long-term marriage is finding a new living situation. Ideally, this represents a positive shift, but that doesn’t mean it won’t be weird.

    After years of cohabitating with another person, living on your own takes some getting used to. There are also other potential adjustments beyond that.

    When you and your spouse owned a home together, odds are, one of you will have to move out. If you haven’t already.

    If you wind up in possession of the house, it may be the first time you have to pay the mortgage entirely on your own. Or bills. Or taxes. This has a huge impact on your financial situation. In many cases, divorcing couples wind up selling their marital home.

    Related Reading: Whether or Not to Sell Your Home During a Divorce

    Altered Family Dynamics

    Divorce after long-term marriages often alters the entire family landscape.

    Even if your kids are grown, live their own lives, and have families of their own, things change drastically. When adult children are involved, there’s no back and forth about custody, child support, visitation, and family weekend trips to Crater Lake. But holidays, birthdays, and family gatherings likely won’t ever look quite the same.

    Though you won’t need an actual parenting plan or visitation schedule, you may wind up with something similar.

    You and your ex may split key holiday celebrations with the kids and grandkids, almost like shared custody. In amicable splits, sometimes divorced parents can still be in the room with each other, but that’s not the norm.

    The longer a marriage, the more your lives become intertwined. The flip side of that is it becomes much more difficult to untangle them in a divorce.

    Even in low-conflict divorces, be aware of several unique legal and financial complications. These are just a few potential hurdles you may face.

    As in most divorces, hiring an attorney is likely in your best interest. An experienced divorce lawyer can help guide you through the treacherous waters toward an optimal outcome.

    Related Reading: Breaking Down Divorce Rates By Generation

  • How Long Does Divorce Take In Oregon?

    We call it the “divorce process” for good reason. It takes a while to end a marriage. But just how long does a divorce take in Oregon?

    You may be ready to end your marriage right this minute, but it’s a journey, one that takes time. No two marriages are identical, thus no two divorces unfold the same way.

    Sometimes, it involves little more than filing the paperwork, paying the applicable fees, and waiting a specified amount of time. This most commonly occurs in shorter marriages with no children and little or no shared property to divide.

    There are more complicated cases where things take longer. How much longer depends.

    How long does a divorce take in Oregon?

    In general, the more complex a marriage, the more you have to deal with, the longer you should expect it to take. Children, tons of property, retirement funds, frequent conflict, and even the length of the marriage itself all play a part.

    Many factors influence how long a divorce takes. Here are a few common hurdles people must clear to dissolve a marriage in Oregon in a timely fashion.

    The Waiting Period

    Divorce laws vary from one state to the next. One of these is the waiting period. This is the minimum amount of time between filing the paperwork and your divorce becoming final.

    Oregon used to have a 90-day waiting period, but the state did away with that a few years back and now there is technically no longer a waiting period.

    After you file the paperwork, your divorce can become final in a matter of days. That said, it usually sits in a stack waiting for a judge to sign it, which may take weeks. Or longer.

    This represents the bare minimum. You can file the papers, pay the fees, and call your marriage done in short order. But many other factors influence how long divorce takes and lengthen the process. You have to reach an agreement in one way or another. This often takes a great deal of time.

    Related Reading: 10 Steps to Create a Divorce Strategy

    Child Custody Disputes

    When it comes to taking up time in divorce, child custody disputes are one of the biggies.

    This is such an emotional issue for parents, tempers often flare, and conflict is common. There are a lot of details to hash out and if you and your ex argue about every point, that slows things down.

    Custody cases must decide where the child lives, child support orders, visitation, decision-making authority, and more. All of this ultimately gets laid out in a parenting plan. Even if the two sides generally agree, creating this document still takes a while.

    The courts aim to serve the best interests of the child, which takes time to determine. Some cases even require third-party evaluations. All of these things can combine to elongate the divorce process.

    Related Reading: How Legal Marijuana Impacts Child Custody

    Division of Property

    You accumulate property, assets, and debts during a marriage. When you divorce, you divide all of this. The more you have to parse out, the longer it takes.

    This can go smoothly. If you have a prenuptial agreement, you both agree ahead of time on who gets what. Or, if you don’t have much to split up, it may happen quickly.

    But again, the more you have, the more potential delays you often encounter.

    Oregon is an equitable distribution state. That means the court seeks to distribute assets fairly and equitably. The goal is for each spouse to emerge on relatively equal footing and maintain a lifestyle similar to that enjoyed during the marriage.

    Property includes the obvious, like houses and cars, but also things like retirement benefits, capital gains, and even airline miles. If you argue about who gets what every step of the way, that lengthens your divorce accordingly. And people can and will argue about everything in some cases.

    These conflicts, and many others, impact how long a divorce takes in Oregon.

    Related Reading: Is Oregon a Community Property State?

    Doing it Yourself

    It’s now easier than ever to take a Do-it-Yourself approach to divorce. You can fill out and file all the forms, no divorce lawyer required. It may even be the best choice in some cases, again, usually simple, straightforward ones.

    The DIY process is ideal for couples without children, much shared property, or significant assets. But in others cases, representing yourself slows things down and draws things out.

    Ending a marriage requires many long, detailed forms, and legalese is not known for being user-friendly or easy to understand. Mistakes, omissions, and improperly filled-out forms cause setbacks and delays.

    Even if you fill the paperwork out yourself, you may want an experienced attorney to take a look before you file. A small expense upfront may save you time, money, and headaches later. And it’s definitely less expensive than hiring a full-time divorce lawyer.

    Related Reading: DIY Divorce: What is Pro Se?

    Evaluations

    We mentioned evaluations earlier, and there are multiple ways they show up and slow down your divorce.

    Parenting evaluations are common occurrences in custody cases. The child’s well-being takes precedence over other issues, so this happens if there are concerns about abuse, mental health, substance abuse, or other red flags.

    If one parent wants to move out of state with the child, you must address that topic. Business evaluations may also be necessary to examine finances. If you and your spouse own a business together, this becomes a divisible asset. It’s common to hire an outside appraiser to determine the value.

    Complicated investment portfolios or situations with significant assets may also necessitate a closer look.

    Again, the common theme pops up, the more you have to deal with, the longer your divorce will likely take.

    These aren’t the only things that can slow down your divorce, but in most cases, this rule of thumb applies, the more there is, the more time it takes.

    Related Reading: Do I Need a Divorce Lawyer? 11 Questions to Ask

    What’s the Worst Case Scenario?

    While the least amount of time your divorce will take in Oregon is days, what’s the worst-case scenario?

    With all the things that can pop up and complicate matters, it’s not uncommon for a contested divorce to last months. Or even longer.

    The more you and your soon-to-be-ex disagree, the more assets you have to divide, the more time you spend.

    If your case involves mediation, arbitration, or court appearances, these require scheduling and coordination. Court dates often don’t happen for months.

    With all the potential delays, divorces often take up to a year or more to finalize. That’s probably not what you want to hear, but it’s all too often the fact of the matter.

    Related Reading: Student Loan Debt And Divorce

    Streamlining the Process for Divorce in Oregon

    Many factors affect how long it takes to divorce in Oregon. However, there are ways you can streamline the process.

    Gathering relevant financial information ahead of time helps. Hiring an experienced divorce attorney who has been through this before also speeds things along.

    Know what you’re willing to fight for and what you’re willing to let go—don’t argue about every point just because, that most often wastes time and money. Figure out what issues you and your spouse agree on so you can get them out of the way immediately.

    Though there are ways to speed things up, know that divorce isn’t a quick process. It’s more important to do it right than do it fast.

    Divorce orders are legally binding court orders, and once in place are difficult to change. Make sure it’s something you can live with. Ending a marriage impacts you, your family, and your finances for years to come, it’s worth the additional effort in the end.

    Related Reading: How To File For Divorce In Oregon

  • Jurisdiction: Does Where You File For Divorce Impact Your Case?

    Once you head down the path of divorce, you have a ton of subsequent decisions to make. This includes where you file for divorce since jurisdiction has a huge impact on what follows.

    Filling out all the proper forms is one thing, but where you ultimately file them may be just as important. Do you file for divorce where you live? Or where your spouse lives? Can you file for divorce in a different county than your residence?

    How Does Jurisdiction Affect Divorce?

    Laws often vary from one state to the next, and even from county to county. Where you live influences how the courts divide property, rule on child custody, and even determine child and spousal support.

    Because of this, you want to take steps to file for divorce in the right state, county, and even court.

    Do You Have To File In The State Where You Married?

    Many people mistakenly believe you must file for divorce in the state where you were married. That’s simply not true. People move around the country all the time. However, if you relocate from state to state often, it can be difficult to pin down where to file for divorce.

    Members of the military often face this issue. You must meet the legal residency requirements of the state where you file for divorce. This keeps people from bouncing from one state to another to find more favorable laws.

    Every state has specific rules and regulations regarding residency. Most require you to live in-state for a specific amount of time before you can dissolve your marriage there.

    For example, you must live continuously in Oregon for six months before you can file for divorce here.

    On the other hand, Kansas only requires 60 days, while New York wants a full year. Some states even have individual counties with residency requirements. For example, if you move from one California county to another, you must wait three months before you can file for divorce there.

    Oregon doesn’t have this stipulation. If you move from Portland to Eugene, you can file immediately. But if you move to Washington, things are different. It’s important to know the regulations and the impact they have.

    Related Reading: What are the Grounds for Divorce in Oregon?

    Can You File For Divorce When You Live In Different States?

    Divorcing spouses often live in different states.

    Depending on the situation, one state may offer certain advantages to filing there. On the other side of that coin, a particular state having jurisdiction may negatively impact your case. Again, knowing how things differ is key.

    It isn’t necessary for both spouses to be legal residents of the same state. If the two parties agree which state has jurisdiction, you can file for divorce there if you choose.

    In cases where both parties have established residency, the state where the papers are first filed usually maintains jurisdiction.

    Related Reading: How Do Criminal Charges Affect Child Custody?

    What Areas Does Jurisdiction Impact in Divorce?

    So, why is where you file for divorce so important? Jurisdiction impacts many facets of the process. It influences your financial state going forward, how often you see your kids, and much more. Here are the ways it can have an impact.

    Division of Property:

    When it comes to the division of property, Oregon practices equitable distribution. Under this model, the court views the property as belonging to the spouse who earned it.

    On the other hand, some states follow community property statutes. They view all assets acquired during a marriage as belonging equally to both. This affects how the court splits up property and assets during a divorce.

    Child Custody:

    Child custody is a huge issue in many divorces. Numerous factors play into the court’s decision.
    Courts can order joint or sole custody, but again, the specifics vary from one state to the next.

    In Oregon, the court can only award joint custody if both parents agree. Beyond that, any person with an established emotional relationship with a child, related by blood or not, can petition for custody or visitation.

    This is quite different from other states and illustrates how much impact jurisdiction has. The way jurisdiction is determined in cases involving children differs, but we’ll talk more about that later.

    Child Support:

    Child support payments cover a child’s basic necessities after divorce. This includes a safe home, food, medical care, education, and more.

    Courts consider a variety of factors when determining the amount. Need, the earning potential of each parent, parenting time, and other factors play their part.

    But states also weigh these elements differently, so the final amount may vary depending on where you file for divorce.

    Spousal Support:

    While it’s less formulaic than child support, Oregon has three types of spousal support:

      • Transitional support is designed to help smooth one spouse’s transition back to single life.
      • Compensatory support pops up most often in cases where the division of property skews sharply one way. Or when one spouse contributed substantially to the future earning potential of the other.
      • Maintenance support usually occurs when there’s a large disparity in earning potential.

    Again, not every state handles things this way, so where you file for divorce often plays a huge role.

    Related Reading: Is Oregon a Community Property State?

    How Does Jurisdiction Affect Child Custody?

    As with most areas of divorce, children complicate matters. Jurisdiction is no different. We touched on how different states rule on child custody. But establishing jurisdiction in custody cases is another issue entirely.

    While spouses can consent to another state having jurisdiction in a divorce, that’s not necessarily the case with custody decisions.

    This is where the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act comes into play. Established in the late 1960s, and adopted by every state by 1981, the UCCJEA is a statute that determines jurisdiction in cases involving children.

    It’s a complicated set of rules and regulations that establish a child’s “home state” in custody situations.

    Designed to serve the well-being and best interests of minor children, the home state is usually where the child lived for the previous six months or one where they have substantial connections.

    These are just a few ways that illustrate the importance of where you file for divorce. Jurisdiction impacts many areas of the process, and it’s vital to know how. State laws often vary in small but significant ways you never expect.

    Whether you live in Oregon or another state can have a huge impact on your settlement, and your life moving forward, and it’s definitely worth learning the ins and outs.

    Related Reading: Best Interest Of The Child

  • When Should You Hire a Divorce Attorney?

    These days, it’s easier than ever to file for divorce. You can find the forms online, fill them out yourself, and, if you follow the proper procedure, end your marriage. This do-it-yourself approach works like gangbusters in some situations, but not in others. At some point in the process, you need to ask yourself: Should I hire a divorce attorney?

    Should You Hire A Divorce Lawyer?

    You have a lot of choices to make during this time, and deciding whether or not to hire a divorce lawyer is a big one.

    By this stage, you’ve probably asked yourself many questions, like why are you staying married? Can you save your marriage? If divorce is truly the best option? It’s important to contemplate these topics.

    The question of whether or not to hire a divorce attorney generally comes up after the decision has already been made to divorce or separate. Maybe you filed for divorce, maybe it was your spouse, or perhaps it was a mutual decision.

    The DIY approach works great in many cases. That’s part of why it’s become so popular. But it also tends to be a better fit in straightforward situations. This usually means shorter marriages without children, with little shared property, and where you agree on everything.

    Related Reading: Pro Se Divorce: What Is DIY Divorce? 

    What Factors Complicate Divorce?

    It is still possible to handle more complicated divorces on your own. But remember, the more complex things become, the more potential hazards you face. Ending a marriage affects custody, your finances, and much more.

    The more complicated your situation, the more you’re likely to benefit when you hire a divorce lawyer. While you can handle the details of your split yourself, having representation benefits you in many areas.

    Division Of Property & Assets

    The more assets you have, the more complex the division of property becomes. This includes homes, cars, bank accounts, and even retirement benefits. Oregon is an equitable distribution state. That means the courts view property as belonging to the spouse who earned it. However, that doesn’t mean the court divides everything along those lines.

    They aim for each spouse to emerge on relatively even financial footing.

    Ideally, courts want both parties to enjoy the standard of living they had while married. Spouses can work together to divide assets. However, the more conflict you have, the more problems usually arise. You may want to hire a divorce lawyer to help ensure the agreement is fair and balanced.

    Related Reading: How Are Businesses Divided During Divorce? Can You Protect It?

    Child Custody

    Having children complicates divorce proceedings in many cases. Custody battles often grow heated and contentious. Again, it is possible to work out a parenting plan between you and your spouse. But in these situations, things get hectic and tangled in no time.

    Having representation helps in many ways, and this may influence your decision to hire a divorce lawyer or not.

    In child custody cases, the court’s overriding mandate is to do what’s in the child’s best interest.

    Enlisting an attorney experienced in his area often proves hugely beneficial. Not only does having a third party help calm down raging emotions, but a professional helps develop a strategy to protect your rights as a parent.

    Related Reading: How Legal Marijuana Impacts Child Custody

    Child Support

    When you have children, child support usually comes into play. How this affects you generally has a lot to do with the custody situation. In general, the parent with the most overnights receives the payments from the other.

    There’s a general formula for determining child support that accounts for need, income, and many other factors.

    These payments cover the costs of caring for the child in question, both regular expenses and also unexpected costs. This includes but isn’t limited to:

      • Food.
      • Clothing.
      • Shelter.
      • Education.
      • Medical care.
      • Any other necessities.

    Related Reading: Fathers’ Rights and Child Custody

    Spousal Support

    While child support has a formula, spousal support is less systematic. When determining whether or not to award spousal maintenance, the court weighs many elements. They consider, among other factors:

      • Need.
      • Age.
      • The length of the marriage.
      • Any continuing health concerns.
      • Future employment opportunities and earning potential.

    The court doesn’t award spousal support in every case, and it can continue indefinitely or only last for a limited time. Ideally, an attorney with experience will prevent you from agreeing to terms you can afford, or ensure you get enough to meet your financial needs.

    Related Reading: The Cost of Divorce: What You Need to Know

    Divorce Settlement

    The DIY approach may result in a quicker, cheaper split than if you hire a divorce lawyer. That said, it may also lead to unexpected issues in the future.

    As we’ve said, the division of property, child custody arrangements, spousal support, child support, and other areas get complicated. They also have a huge financial impact on your life moving forward.

    Divorce settlements are complex legal documents. It’s all too easy to sign on the dotted line and not truly understand what it says.

    A judge won’t generally approve a divorce settlement that skews too drastically in favor of one spouse or the other. That doesn’t mean it’s entirely fair or as equitable as it could be.

    Once the court issues a divorce decree, they’re difficult, not to mention expensive, to modify. If you hire a divorce lawyer, they can help head off potential disasters ahead of time.

    If you do go the DIY route, consider consulting an attorney even if you don’t hire a divorce lawyer for the entire case. They can explain your rights, point you in the right direction, and make sure you know exactly what you’re agreeing to before you sign.

    Related Reading: Divorce FAQs

    How Do I Know When to Hire A Divorce Attorney?

    Besides the factors listed above, there are many additional questions to ask yourself when deciding whether or not to hire a divorce attorney. Answering these smaller questions often helps you decide on the big one.

    This is by no means an exhaustive list and it certainly doesn’t cover every scenario. However, by the end, you’ll hopefully have a better idea of your needs.

    Are You Ready to Divorce?

    Infidelity, abuse, financial betrayal, and more. Marriages end for many reasons, but not all of them are dramatic. Often relationships just don’t work out or people drift apart over time. You may roll your eyes and say, “Duh,” at this statement, but you need to consider whether your marriage is truly over and if you’re ready to walk away.

    The answer to this question is different for everyone, and though it may sound obvious, it’s an important one to ask.

    Related Reading: 4 Divorce Tips and Strategies

    Does Your Spouse Have a Divorce Lawyer?

    Did your spouse already hire a divorce lawyer? If so, it’s most often in your best interests to hire one of your own. At least do the legwork and explore your options.

    We commonly compare representing yourself against an experienced attorney to a beer league softball player getting into the batter’s box against an MLB pitcher. Sure, they’re technically the same game, but not really. It usually puts you at a serious disadvantage.

    Related Reading: Preparing for Your Initial Consultation With a Divorce Lawyer

    Do You Understand the Legal Paperwork?

    You have numerous places where you can download forms, fill them out, and file them yourself. But do you truly know what you’re signing? Legal language and paperwork are notoriously complex and specific.

    If you make a mistake it can damage the outcome or even invalidate the entire process.

    In many cases, it’s worth the expense to hire a divorce lawyer to guide you through the ins and outs. Or at least to examine the paperwork before you finalize things. That alone often saves people money and headaches.

    Related Reading: How to Divorce in Oregon: Forms and Filing

    Is Your Divorce High-Conflict?

    Most people don’t end a marriage because everything is great. Divorce can be an emotional and tumultuous experience full of bitterness, resentment, and conflict.

    People don’t always think straight or consider the consequences of their actions. A divorce lawyer provides a steady hand and rational opinion in chaotic times and keeps you from making rash decisions based on anger.

    Related Reading: Is January Really Divorce Month?

    Can You And Your Ex Communicate?

    One common side effect of conflict in divorce is it often becomes difficult to communicate. If you can’t see or speak to your spouse without fighting, how can you effectively negotiate the terms of your divorce?

    Again, experienced representation helps keep situations calm and serves as a buffer or go-between for warring exes who can’t be in the same room.

    Related Reading: How Adultery Really Affects Divorce

    Do You Know What You’re Entitled To?

    Do you know what you’re legally entitled to? Every situation is different, but you have rights to a portion of shared assets. When you have kids, you also have parental rights.

    If your spouse has a pension or other retirement account, guess what? You may have a legal claim to a share of that in the settlement.

    Divorce comes with a list of rules, regulations, and laws. Many of them are obvious and well-known, but others aren’t. People often give up or miss valuable items because they don’t know their true worth. (For example, did you know airline miles are sometimes divisible?)

    If you hire a divorce attorney, they clue you into things you didn’t know existed and keep you from leaving assets on the table.

    Related Reading: Financial Mistakes During Divorce

    Is Your Divorce Complex?

    Do you own multiple homes, keep a fleet of expensive cars, or have multiple children of various ages? While it is possible (again, there’s that word) for you and your ex to hammer out a divorce settlement on your own, the more factors you have to consider, the trickier it becomes and the more potential pitfalls you face.

    It’s all too easy to make costly mistakes. Once the documents are signed, it’s a pricey slog to change them. So it’s best, not to mention easier, to do things right the first time.

    Related Reading: Legal Marijuana and Child Custody

    Is That Divorce Settlement Fair?

    As we’ve said, divorce has a major impact on your financial future. It’s important to handle your business so you don’t kick off this new phase of your life in the hole. You can’t just agree to a proposed settlement to be done with the process faster.

    What you need is to be certain a settlement is fair and gives you what you need. When you hire a divorce lawyer, they ensure an agreement includes what it should, that it’s the best you’ll get, and whether or not it’s fair.

    Related Reading: What’s the Average Cost of Divorce in Oregon?

    Can Both Spouses Use The Same Divorce Lawyer?

    This question comes up more than you might think. The short answer is: no, you can’t both use the same divorce lawyer.

    You’re not legally required to have counsel to divorce, but if you do, you and your spouse each need your own.

    Ethical rules—and in most cases, state laws—prohibit attorneys from representing clients with competing interests. And few situations so clearly present a conflict of interest as working for both sides in a divorce.

    Even seemingly innocuous questions have different answers for each party. If you ask a question, the response may be different than if your spouse asks the same one, and it’s an attorney’s job to make the language in any documents benefit their client.

    No matter what decision you ultimately make, just remember that ending a marriage impacts every facet of your life. With that in mind, it’s almost always in your best interest to hire a divorce lawyer. It seems and often is expensive. No one denies that. However, in most situations, experienced representation only benefits you and your case.

    Related Reading: How Is Property Divided In Divorce In Oregon?

  • No-Fault Divorce in Oregon: What are Grounds for Divorce?

    When you read about divorce, you often see “irreconcilable differences” listed as the root cause of the separation. You hear this phrase frequently because the term comes from the modern “no-fault” divorce code.

    What Is No Fault Divorce?

    It’s been in the news lately, but what exactly does no-fault divorce mean?

    Just like it sounds, no-fault divorce means, legally speaking, neither party shoulders the blame for the end of a marriage. No one has to prove the other was in the wrong. In short, to divorce, the law only requires that one of you wants out of the marriage.

    No-Fault Divorce in the U.S.

    The first no-fault statute in the U.S. was passed in California in 1969. Over the following 50 years, all 50 states either removed fault-based divorce from their code or added a no-fault “irreconcilable differences” clause to their code.

    Therefore, in every state, you have the option to choose a no-fault divorce. However, in a few states, fault-based divorce remains on the table. In these jurisdictions, obtaining a no-fault divorce is much more challenging if one party contests the divorce.

    No-Fault Divorce in Oregon

    So, when asking if Oregon a no-fault divorce state, the answer is: Yes.

    The current statute in Oregon provides that a divorce may be rendered when:

    “[I]rreconcilable differences between the parties have caused the irremediable breakdown of the marriage.”

    Furthermore, Oregon removed all fault-based divorce standards.

    This means the courts will not consider evidence of acts of misconduct in divorce proceedings. This can and does still pop up in child custody matters if you show the relevance of such evidence.

    Similarly, when dividing property between spouses, the courts no longer consider evidence of misconduct or fault. Instead, any assets or debts acquired during your marriage are divided under the state’s equitable distribution model.

    Related Reading: How Can Adultery Affect a No-Fault Divorce?

    Fault-Based Divorce

    Traditional fault-based grounds for divorce are very similar to breach of contract actions. The most common grounds for divorce included:

      • Adultery.
      • Sexual deviance.
      • Mental illness.
      • Abandonment or desertion.
      • Criminal conviction.
      • Substance abuse.

    Arguments For No-Fault Divorce

    Proponents of no-fault divorces argue that fault-based divorces are an anachronistic legal concept. They take the stance that those laws no longer reflect the reality of marriages in modern-day America.

    Additionally, they feel removing fault from divorce proceedings also removes much of the anger, bitterness, and acrimony that attends a divorce where one party must show the other was to blame.

    Arguments Against No-Fault Divorce

    Opponents of no-fault divorces cite the shift as the cause of the rising divorce rate, an increase in poverty for women, and a decrease in society’s value of marriage as a social pillar.

    Before the passage of the no-fault code, divorce was only allowed when the parties could demonstrate fault or blame in the marriage, such as abuse, adultery, or infertility. However, over the past 50 years, the laws across the country shifted from fault-based to no-fault divorces.

    Related Reading: How Long Does Divorce Take in Oregon?

  • Is January Really Divorce Month?

    Key Takeaways:

    • January is often referred to as “Divorce Month,” but that name may be somewhat misleading.
    • The pressures of the holidays often play a role in the timing and decision to divorce.
    • Data supports a seasonal pattern, not a single month.
    • January is often the starting point for divorce, not the finish line.
    • “Divorce Season” may be a more accurate term than “Divorce Month.”
    • Another “Divorce Season” occurs in late summer.

    Fair or not, nicknames often stick and are hard to shake. A pesky moniker can follow you around for years. How many of us have a friend who will forever be “Tiny” or “Lefty” or “Gonzo” for some long-forgotten reason?

    This doesn’t just happen to people, either. To some, the month of January, all 31 days, has become known as “Divorce Month.”

    The basic idea is that couples push to end their marriages in the days that immediately follow the New Year. But the question arises: Is this an accurate nickname? Is January really divorce month?

    As is so often the case, the answer to whether or not January really is divorce month is complicated.

    The truth is a little bit yes and a little bit no. One report may have put it best when describing January not necessarily as divorce month, but as a time of year when couples examine divorce options.

    divorce month januaryWhy Is January Considered Divorce Month?

    How did January become known as divorce month?

    Several factors contribute to an increased number of people dissolving marriages this time of year.

    In some instances, people put off acting on a decision they have already made, waiting to get past the stress and chaos of the holidays. With family around, the kids out of school, and celebrations galore, some people put on a brave face and power through. Maybe you tried for one last happy holiday and didn’t want to ruin the festive mood.

    In other cases, holidays may be the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. All the additional anxiety and activity put increased pressure on a marriage. For a relationship that’s already in trouble, a big fight or a strained family gathering may become a breaking point.

    Financial concerns also often play a part. Holiday spending and expensive travel arrangements can exacerbate money concerns and lead to friction. Some people get significant end-of-year bonuses. And by waiting until the new year, the divorce doesn’t impact taxes from the previous one.

    For some, it’s as simple as looking for a fresh start in a new year. This is the time when people enact change and attempt to fix problems in their lives. A broken marriage is certainly a problem that needs fixing.

    Related Reading: How Long Does Divorce Take in Oregon?

    divorce month januaryEvidence of Divorce Month

    For years, there’s been plenty of anecdotal evidence to label January divorce month.

    Divorce attorneys often note an increase in calls and new cases when the calendar turns over. Some people merely feel out the process and explore their options at first, while others are ready to dive in and get things done right now.

    Increasingly in recent years, several studies have lent statistical backing to support divorce month claims. A 2016 report from the University of Washington examined data about divorce filings over 14 years. From 2001-2015, researchers noted a consistent rise in divorce proceedings beginning in January.

    The researchers behind this study also note the influence holidays have on this pattern. They refer to “culturally sacred” times as a reason why people often put off divorce. Many feel doing so during the holidays is “inappropriate, even taboo.” No one wants to be the jerk who ruined Christmas for everyone.

    Related Reading: Common Divorce Mistakes and How to Avoid Them

    divorce month januaryDivorce Month is a Misnomer

    Calling January divorce month is, however, a bit of a misnomer.

    While the number of divorce filings does indeed begin to climb during the first month of the year, according to the data they don’t peak until March.

    In reality, there’s a simple explanation for this: divorce takes time. It’s called the divorce process for a reason.

    A great deal goes into ending your marriage. This is often the time of year when people get the ball rolling. You explore your options, meet with and potentially hire a divorce lawyer, make a plan for the kids, set up a support network, save money, and generally establish a strategy to move forward.

    It’s not simple or fast. While you may begin in January, you likely won’t finish until much later.

    In certain situations, you can handle a divorce quickly. These are usually shorter marriages with little shared property and no children. Cases like this are often straightforward. But the more you have to contend with, the more complicated your case becomes. This means it takes longer.

    Establishing custody, creating parenting plans, dividing commingled assets, and more all take time and energy. You have to collect documents, deal with discovery, and you may wind up in mediation, arbitration, or even go to trial.

    If you and your spouse are on the same page, this can go smoothly, but the more conflict, the more complicated and time-consuming things become.

    In a practical sense, January isn’t necessarily divorce month so much as it’s often the starting line. You feel out the situation, look into possible options, and begin the process. Online searches for terms like “divorce,” “child custody,” and other family law topics also rise during this season.

    Related Reading: Fathers’ Rights And Child Custody: With Infographic

    divorce month januaryJanuary Isn’t Alone

    Though January hogs the spotlight as divorce month, it’s not alone. The UW study demonstrates that the January through March window shows a 33% increase in divorce filings.

    But that isn’t the only time the numbers spike.

    The period from July through August follows a similar arc. During this span, the numbers experience a 30% bump, rising steadily and then peaking as the summer winds down.

    This time of year features many similar strains and stresses as the holidays. The kids are out of school and need care, many families go on vacation, and the pressures mount on fragile marriages. Also, when it comes to deciding custody, the courts are often reluctant to make a big change during the school year. In many cases, it makes sense to hash things like that out during breaks.

    The decision to end your marriage is huge. It impacts every facet of your life. And like most big decisions, it’s important to consider the timing.

    January is a popular time to start the process of dissolving your marriage but to call it divorce month isn’t entirely accurate. At the same time, it isn’t entirely wrong. Perhaps talking about “divorce seasons” offers a more accurate description than a single divorce month.

    Other Reading: How Do Major Purchases Affect Divorce?

  • How Does Adultery Affect Divorce in Oregon?

    Many factors contribute to a divorce. Adultery is often a big one.

    Infidelity often has a destructive, devastating effect on a marriage. It’s a huge breach of trust. In many cases, perhaps even most, if one spouse is caught having an affair, that’s it, call it a day.

    But, despite the catastrophic impact on your relationship, how does cheating affect the actual divorce process? Or, does it? The real answer surprises many people.

    Does Adultery Affect Divorce?

    Depending on where you live, adultery may or may not play a part in your divorce settlement.

    In certain states, adulterers can’t receive spousal support after the dissolution of a marriage. For others, it influences the division of property.

    North Carolina, for example, even has “homewrecker” laws. In one case, a man sued the man with whom his wife cheated. The courts awarded the plaintiff $750,000.

    From a divorce perspective, the consequences vary greatly from state to state. But here’s what adultery may mean for your settlement if you live in Oregon.

    Related Reading: How is Debt Divided in Oregon?

    What Is A No-Fault Divorce?

    Before diving into the deep end, it’s important to understand no-fault divorce. And to know that Oregon is a no-fault divorce state.

    What that means is fairly simple:

    • There are no grounds for divorce.
    • And no specific criteria must be met.

    Basically, you don’t have to prove either spouse caused the marriage to fail. All that’s required is for one party to declare “irreconcilable differences,” with no hope of resolving these issues, and the state will grant a divorce.

    There are no “innocent” and “guilty” parties. As long as you are legally married, meet the Oregon residential requirements, and follow the proper procedures, you’ll get your divorce.

    Because of this, whether or not one spouse cheated often proves largely irrelevant when it comes to ending your marriage. Legally speaking, the why is not the important part of this equation.

    The simple fact that one party wants to end the union is the key element. That doesn’t necessarily mean infidelity doesn’t factor into the process at all, as it can impact other areas. However, exactly how much varies on a case-by-case basis.

    Related Reading: How Long Does Divorce Take in Oregon?

    Adultery and Property Division

    Since Oregon is a no-fault divorce state, adultery has no bearing on whether or not you will be granted a divorce. Unless it directly relates to a decision the court has to rule on, you may not even be allowed to testify about any wrongdoings on the part of your spouse.

    One place where adultery may play a part is when it comes to the division of property in the divorce settlement. Emphasis on the word “may.”

    This usually only happens when cheating directly impacts the financial circumstances of one party. For example, if an affair incurred expenses.

    Did your ex rack up extensive travel and hotel fees? Did they empty shared bank accounts to buy significant gifts? In cases like these, the court may consider adultery when dividing assets.

    Even if this is the case, however, it can be difficult to prove in court.

    Related Reading: How Oregon Divides Property in Divorce

    Adultery And Spousal Support

    As with property division, we rarely see cases in which adultery affects spousal support awards.

    Proving financial hardship as a result of infidelity can be tough. You must confirm the impact in a concrete way for the court. There are instances where this happens, however.

    If you can show that your spouse drained your savings in the course of an affair. Perhaps infidelity led directly to a large debt. In those situations, the court may order temporary spousal support.

    Another situation is if cheating caused significant emotional distress. So much so that it impacted your ability to work and hold a job. That might also play a role, though again, demonstrating this in a tangible way often proves difficult.

    Related Reading: How Is Spousal Support Calculated in Oregon?

    Adultery and Child Custody

    Exactly how much, if at all, does adultery factor into decisions regarding child custody in Oregon?

    Much like in other areas, for this to have a significant influence on guardianship and visitation, you must show that cheating directly impacts one party’s ability, or inability, as a parent.

    Perhaps you can prove that, because of an affair, one spouse showed a pattern of neglect. Did your ex choose infidelity over parental duties? Did they forget to pick up the kids at soccer practice because they were engaged in an illicit tryst? The court may consider that when it comes to custody.

    Again, you must concretely show that a spouse’s adultery impaired his or her ability as a parent. If not, it may not be presented as relevant information in the case at hand.

    This door also swings both ways. While you hope to demonstrate that infidelity impacts your ex’s capacity to care for a child, your ex may attempt to show that it does not.

    As traumatic and damaging as adultery can be to a marriage, and as great an impact as it can have on the state of the relationship between two people, it may not have a massive effect on your actual divorce proceedings.

    If you demonstrate a definite, causal connection between infidelity and things like financial hardships or parenting ability, the court may take it into consideration.

    If not, it usually has much less influence than you might initially expect.

    Related Reading: The Cost of Divorce: What You Should Know

  • How Has the Divorce Rate Changed With Each Generation?

    The common refrain is that the divorce rate in the United States hovers around the 50% mark. Except it doesn’t, and never has. The hows and whys of that, however, are a topic of conversation for another time.

    In reality, the divorce rate is lower than in years and has been on a steady if gradual decline. An interesting exercise is to look at divorce by generation and investigate the changing views.

    How Attitudes About Divorce Have Changed Over Generations

    There are currently six living generations of Americans.

    Attitudes towards families and marriage form a definitive piece of each, and examining them provides some insight. There are, of course, exceptions to every rule, and we’ll be looking at these in broad strokes.

    Not every member of every generation fits each mold exactly. However, looking at the larger trends of the divorce rate by generation lets us see how prevailing norms evolve.

    Related Reading: 8 Ways to Prepare for Divorce

    GI Generation

    Also widely called the “Greatest Generation,” these are people born from 1901-1926. They experienced two World Wars firsthand, as well as the Great Depression.

    One of the defining characteristics of this era is a strong sense of duty, civic responsibility, and right and wrong.

    This black-and-white sense of the world extends to how the GI Generation looks at divorce. They take the “‘til death do us part” segment of the wedding vows very seriously. Marriage is a commitment, for life.

    Things like divorce or having children out of wedlock are simply not acceptable. Divorce carries a stain and stigma. Because of these dominant cultural and societal attitudes, fewer people from this age group stray from that path.

    Related Reading: How Political Differences Can Cause Divorce

    Mature Silents

    Born between 1927 and 1945, the generation known as the Mature Silents, or Silent Generation, carry similar touchstones of the previous age group.

    Many fought in the Korean and Vietnam Wars, but they also experienced the post-World War II economic boom. Though there were the first rumblings of the Civil Rights movement and feminism, it was generally a time of great conformity.

    This conformity also extended to how we look at divorce by generation in this instance. In general, the husband worked, primarily at one job for one employer his entire career, while the wife stayed home with the kids. Marriage is, again, usually for life, and things like divorce and having children outside of marriage are simply not acceptable.

    Related Reading: Ways to Save Money During Divorce

    Baby Boomers

    Born just after World War II, in the years 1946-1965, the Baby Boomers are the generation that embraced rock and roll, social change, credit cards, and television. With 77 million people, it’s also one of the largest single generations in history.

    Widely regarded as self-centered, this age group, also nicknamed the “Me Generation,” pushed against traditional social constructs and boundaries.

    Their attitudes toward divorce, marriage, and families reflect this changing tide.

    When breaking down divorce by generation, this is where the biggest shifts occur. In large part, this is due to the sheer size of this demographic. There’s a lot of them, so they carry a lot of weight.

    Women of this generation entered the workplace in previously unheard-of numbers. This created more dual-income households. But it’s also the first era where mothers weren’t as pervasive in a child’s life as before.

    For the first time, divorce became more widely accepted. Because of an increased emphasis on individuality, divorce was viewed as an acceptable way to deal with an unhappy marriage.

    You were no longer expected to stick it out through irreconcilable differences. This era also began the age of no-fault divorce, where you can end a marriage simply because you want to, without providing cause.

    Even as the Baby Boomers continue to age, they divorce more than any other age group. Between 1990 and 2012, the divorce rate for 55 to 64-year-olds more than doubled. For the 65-and-older crowd, that number more than tripled.

    Related Reading: Divorce or Legal Separation?

    Generation X

    Since Baby Boomers had fewer children than their parents, Generation X, those born between 1965 and 1980, is smaller than its predecessor.

    More cynical about society and authority, they have an eye on individuality and are likely to change careers multiple times over their lives. They’re also unique in numerous ways when we look at divorce by generation.

    As Baby Boomers focused on career advancement, both parents were likely to work. Since divorce became commonplace, Generation X was the first era where having divorced parents was normal. It wasn’t strange or bad; it was just a common fact of life.

    For the most part, Generation X responded to this by staying married. More people also put off marrying or decide not to marry at all. But once they say “I do,” GenXers remain married at higher rates than the preceding generation.

    Roughly 70% of marriages that took place in the 1990s made it to their 15th anniversary. This is up from 65% for those in the ‘70s and ‘80s. And that number continues to increase. The divorce rate for couples married in the 2000s is even lower.

    Related Reading: How to File for Divorce in Oregon

    Millennials

    Millennials, born between 1981-2000, rely more heavily on technology than any previous generation. This is the age group that grew up almost entirely with computers in homes and schools.

    Generally raised by involved parents, they have a reputation for being overindulged and entitled.

    As far as marriage and divorce compared to other generations, Millennials continue some of GenX’s trends. Their marriage rate is the lowest in years at 26%. Compare that to 36% for Generation X, 48% for Baby Boomers, and 65% for the Mature Silents. Millennials put marriage off, or avoid it altogether, at higher rates than ever.

    Many attribute this to changing gender roles, increased focus on education, and financial concerns. It’s more common than ever for a couple to live together and even have children and start families without marrying.

    Again, this represents a generational evolution in ideas of marriage and family.

    Related Reading: Creating a Divorce Strategy

    Gen Z

    There’s one more age group, those born after 2001, known widely as Generation Z. There were a few other nicknames along the way, but this one stuck.

    They’ve never known a world without cell phones, laptops, or video games. Within these numbers, there are even wider demographic changes.

    2006 saw a record number of births, even more than the start of the Baby Boom. So, Gen Z is a big generation.

    Consequently, whatever patterns and attitudes emerge will have a substantial overall impact. We’ll have to wait and see if they continue to push off marriage and if divorce rates continue to decline. However, if they continue Millenial trends, their divorce rate seems likely to remain relatively low.

    While it’s still too early to look at Gen Z for much concrete information, they promise to be an interesting lens through which to view divorce by generation.

    Related Reading: Is the 50% Divorce Rate a Lie?

  • Prepare For Your Initial Divorce Consultation

    Getting divorced is a daunting task and an intimidating proposition. In many, if not most cases, hiring an experienced attorney to help you through the process is a sound strategy. However that in itself can be an overwhelming experience.

    Finding the right lawyer—more specifically, the right lawyer for you and your case—is tough. (Remember, the best divorce attorney means different things in different cases.) And then you have to meet with your attorney. Fortunately, there are things you can do to prepare for your initial consultation.

    Remember You’re Both Meeting For The First Time

    Remember, while you’re meeting this attorney for the first time, the initial consultation also presents the opportunity to meet you. This provides a chance for both sides to make sure this is a good fit.

    How this goes often differs from firm to firm. You may meet with a solo practitioner, where he or she is the only attorney.

    When it comes to firms with multiple lawyers, things vary even more. For example, at Goldberg Jones, after an initial consultation with our managing attorney, he pairs you with the attorney he feels is the best fit for you and your case. However, having someone you’re comfortable with representing you is key.

    Related Reading: How Long Does Divorce Take In Oregon?

    Make Sure You Can Communicate

    Divorce is a traumatic time. You may not always think straight. Being able to clearly and accurately communicate your needs is a huge and important part of the process. If your lawyer doesn’t know what you want, it makes their job, and getting an optimal outcome, that much more difficult.

    Your initial consultation is the time for you to gauge this connection. You don’t need to be best friends, but your divorce lawyer is someone you’ll work with closely. Making sure you can accomplish that and effectively communicate is vital to the success of your case.

    Related Reading: Does Oregon Have Common Law Marriage?

    Is Your Lawyer Experienced In Your Area?

    Some attorneys work in many areas. But it makes sense to hire a divorce attorney if you’re going through a divorce. Even then, there’s a great deal of specialization and the initial consultation is also the time to suss that out.

    • Do you have kids? If so, a lawyer with experience in child custody cases may be best suited to your case.
    • Is there a great deal of shared property to divide? An attorney with knowledge of high-asset divorces might be just what you need.

    Whatever specific criteria you have, make sure to ask the right questions. It can relate to taxes, military service, pensions, or maybe you and your spouse own a business together. It’s crucial to find a divorce lawyer who fits the needs and criteria of your case.

    Related Reading: Preparing for Divorce

    Ask About Fees And Billing

    An initial consultation is a perfect time to discuss fees. Part of finding the right divorce attorney is being able to afford the right divorce attorney. Ask your lawyer to explain their billing practices right out of the gate.

    • Do the costs break down hourly, by the half-hour, in 15-minute increments?
    • Do they also charge for work done by support staff or for making phone calls and sending emails?

    No one wants to get blindsided by a massive, unexpected bill.

    Related Reading: What is the Average Cost of Divorce in Oregon?

    What To Bring To An Initial Consultation

    The more information a divorce attorney has, the better idea you’ll get about your case. As such, you likely want to bring a number of documents to your initial consultation.

    • Recent tax returns and lists of assets and financial obligations are pretty standard—the more complete your records, the better.
    • Bank statements, credit card statements, mortgages, and auto loans are also typical.
    • If you own a business with your spouse, bring any corporate tax records.

    Basically, collect any pertinent documents ahead of time. This includes prenuptial agreements, any existing court orders, and more. It’s better to have information and not need it than the other way around.

    Related Reading: 5 Financial Mistakes that Damage Divorce Settlements

    After The Initial Consultation

    After your initial consultation, you also have a great deal to do. There are forms to file, a spouse to serve (or service to respond to), and a case to prepare for. If you hire a lawyer, he or she will most likely guide you through this tricky process. That said, there are ways to prepare that may streamline things and cut costs.

    • Educate Yourself: Whether you go through mediation, arbitration, or a full trial, it’s good to know what to expect. Understanding the process, you can do some of the legwork. Knowing what’s going on also helps ease stress in a stressful time.
    • Organize: Collecting and organizing all the pertinent documents and information saves you and your divorce attorney time and hassle. And if you gather financial papers, tax documents, and more, that’s time your lawyer doesn’t have to spend chasing them down and billing you.
    • Know When To Fight And When Not To: Know going in what’s important to you and what you can live without. Divorcing couples often spend time and money battling over items of little consequence. Do you really want to spend $500 in attorney’s fees fighting over a shoebox full of cookie cutters? It happens more often than you think. Don’t be a pushover, but know where you’re willing to compromise. Save the fight for things that have a lasting and substantial impact.
    • Your Lawyer Is Not Your Therapist: Your divorce lawyer is on your side and probably knows many intimate details about your life. But that doesn’t mean you should use your time together like a therapist’s couch. You want them to empathize with you, yes, but they’re not for unburdening your deepest thoughts. That gets expensive and it’s not why you hired a legal professional in the first place.

    Your initial divorce consultation with an attorney can be a stressful experience. But knowing what to expect ahead of time goes a long way toward preparing you. It helps to know what to ask and what to look for. This is by no means an exhaustive list, but hopefully, it provides a better idea of what’s in store.

    Related Reading: Community Property Vs Equitable Distribution: What’s The Difference?